“I’M NOT AN ALCOHOLIC…”

One of the most difficult symptoms of addiction disorders is denial, which is often a big problem. My comments here, for the sake of simplicity, will be directed toward alcohol use, but can and should be easily applied to any other addictive behaviors.
Many alcoholics deny that they need help because of how they live their lives around their drinking. It works like this: If I can do X, then I’m not an alcoholic.

The two most common applications of this denial game have to do with work and drinking frequency. If I show up at work every day, I’m not an alcoholic. If I only get drunk on the weekend – or some other division of time – I’m in control of my drinking, so I don’t need help.

Here’s the real determinant: If drinking – or any other addiction – is sustained by a pattern of behavior that’s stronger than you are, in clinical terms, you’re considered an addict. What that means is that if you tell yourself you’ll have one drink and find yourself waking up under the table, your ego (the part of you that makes plans, decisions, etc.) was not part of that story. Or if you wait all week until Friday night and then drink yourself into a stupor, it doesn’t matter that you weren’t drinking all week. What matters is that when you’re drinking, the drinking is in charge, not you. If you drink every Friday night and it’s always one or two drinks, you’re fine. If the process involves your losing control, regardless of what happens the next morning, or how often you do it, you have a problem.

Denial is major. Get past it and you’ve really turned the corner.

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More to come…

Dr. James Kraut

My passion is to help guide you if you have chosen to look profoundly into the questions of your life. My goal is to help you get to the point where your existence on this wonderful planet has become a richer, deeper, and more meaningful process. Every story is unique and I would love to learn about yours.

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